“I’d like to practice English and learn new things when I’m at home, but I don’t know how or where to start.”

There’s not a day without somebody saying that to me. Students, friends, random people—all of them seem to be facing the same obstacle. They are not capable of finding the right methodology to integrate English into their daily life. You know I’m a steadfast believer of living the language more than simply learning it. Getting to know a language should be an enjoyable cohabitation, not a traumatizing brain-stuffing experience.

Still, I’ve heard brilliant students of mine lament the fact they “couldn’t find the time” or “couldn’t find the motivation” to give English a more important place in their lives. I’d like to share with you four simple ways to truly get yourself to cohabit with English and not only have a pacified, but actually enjoyable relationship with it!

 

You’re with a friend

The language you’re learning is not a ten-foot-tall monster you’re attempting to defeat. While English might make you feel uncomfortable, it’s not out there to get you at night. It’s not an entity you want to control, master, and wrestle into submission. It’s a friend you want to get to know better. It’s a buddy you want to have a few beers with. It’s the cool, stylish girlfriend who takes you out for lunch. Stop seeing your learning as a fight. I see too many students who are excited when they pass a Cambridge exam, exclaiming how relieved they are that they’re done with it! While I understand the feeling, it shouldn’t be that way. Yes, you’re asked to take a Cambridge exam; but more importantly, you’re developing your own relationship with English.

You’ll never stop learning. You’ll never truly master English, or any other language. Languages are not something you can conquer. You’ll never defeat them. Why would you want to defeat a friend anyway? You’re not fighting against anything; you’re not even fighting against yourself. You’re building a relationship with a friend. Learn with them, accept you can’t always agree on everything, and make sure you relax.

Think about all that. Now let’s get to the practical part.

 

Listen to your friend

A really hardworking student of mine was telling me the other day about how great he had felt on the day he had followed my advice of “listening to the rhythm and sound of English without trying to understand the meaning.” He told me he had laid on his bed and listened to a radio program for some time, not attempting to figure out the meaning of the words, simply appreciating the musicality and the beauty of the language. I was incredibly proud of him, as not many people are capable of doing such an exercise. He told me with a big smile on his face that he had been able to “feel the flow of the language.”

Most people are so impatient that they believe it would be a waste of time to not do a proper listening exercise, i.e. being totally concentrated on what is being said, and trying to understand every single word. While it goes without saying that listening exercises should be given a prime spot in your learning, they aren’t the best way to help you feel truly comfortable with the language. What you want to do at times is to offer a relaxed, almost unfocused ear. For example, you might want to…

• Watch a TV show, but doing some cleaning at the same time, going from one room to another, with the show in the background. You will probably only understand a few elements, but you’re inciting your brain to fill in the gaps.
• Watch a TV show when very tired and start gently falling asleep in front of it. Now, don’t get too excited: don’t believe you will learn anything while sleeping. However, you’ll be very relaxed before falling asleep and will be more likely to accept the fact you don’t have to understand every single word to enjoy the TV show.

Once your start listening to your friend without considering it as a chore or something boring, then you can develop that relationship further—activities!

 

Share common interests

Many people tell me that whenever they want to practice English, they google something akin to “practice English online,” or “English exercises intermediate level.” Don’t do that to yourself. You want to have a good time and learn stuff at the same time. I mean, if you truly hated bowling, would you take your friend to the bowling alley? No, you’d try to find a common interest and have an enjoyable time with that person.

The good news is that your friend English likes absolutely everything–just go online and see for yourself. Great content is available in English for every single topic imaginable; remember that more than 50% of the internet is in English! You don’t want to do exercises; you want to read, listen to, and watch exciting content that happens to be in English. For example, you might want to…

• Start with the Wikipedia page of a topic you love, whether it is fashion, literature, motorsports, bass fishing, red meat, or John Malkovich. Read it, get lost in it, click links, live adventures.
• Find a YouTube channel relevant to your interests. Again, I’m not talking about a YouTube channel dedicated to English learning; I’m talking about a channel about video games, cleaning, travels, or cooking, that happens to be in English. The fact it happens to be in English is just a coincidence. You should only care about how interesting or exciting the topic and the channel are to you.

“I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship,” says Rick to Louis at the end of Casablanca. But keeping friends also involve getting together with them quite often.

 

See your friend as often as possible

You have more time available than you might think. I know you’re probably working nine to five, trying to balance your personal and professional life. But look, you don’t need to sit down for an hour and “do some English.” Do you have ten minutes? Read a short article. Five minutes? Watch a video. Bathroom break? Read a short online post! It’s absolutely essential to understand that great learning comes from constantly peppering your life with a little English. Why don’t you read the morning news in English with your first cup of coffee?

Everything counts. Have you ever tried setting your phone’s language to English? Have you ever watched the original intro of your favorite American TV show? What about reading about your favorite recipe from the perspective of a British cook? Do things in English as often as you can. Even if it’s only five minutes a day. Hey, have you checked my Facebook page? I post something new every day. Why not make it part of your daily breakfast routine?

Learning a language doesn’t work well with a one-size-fits-all approach; but I truly hope you’ll find what helps you learn and love English as much I do. I would really appreciate to get feedback from you guys; if you have developed your own strategies to build a closer relationship with English, I’d love to hear about them!